On quiet nights like these as we take stock of what we have accomplished and what lies on the road ahead, I find it quite relaxing to head to the crafting tables and lay out the needed items for razor sharp killing machines. And for this night, the Two-Handed Flaming Sword of Crushing was on the list and for a bit of dramatic flair, a Weapon Cut Ruby to give it a brilliant fiery finish.

This is something I’ve been meaning to create for some time, but to be honest, I simply didn’t know how. My early adventuring trips had yielded good quantities of loot and now my drawers were stuff with ore. And since I had all this junk in the trunk, it was time to put it to good use. We all know that’s means making weapons.

For this night I had a plan. Nay, I had something better than a meager plan. I had combat and crafting Sensei, Alley Oop, to walk me through the process to make sure I did it right and that I didn’t t blow up myself, the house or the surrounding area. A forest fire in Braemar would be a terrible thing, especially since I just bought and planted all those new trees out front.

The first order of business was to secure a mortar and pestle. I’m not quite sure what this has to do with combat preparedness, but I’m here to learn. From there we raided my cabinet full of looted tower booty and brought out a variety of ores which I was to smelt down into ingots. Haha! Fire is involved! Perfect.

But before I could turn my meager smelting station into a blast furnace, I needed to make the long trek to Owl’s Head to procure the proper ruby and sword mold. I had much time to ponder on the open road and my mind drifted to my previous crafting endeavors. Suffice it to say, the Explosive Potions put a damper on the creation of future goods. But hey, still got all my fingers and toes, so what could possibly go wrong?

Back at the stations, Alley cracked the whip and I stoked the fires until I had multiple ingots of copper and iron ready. From there we hit the real forge and brought all the items together to make a finely crafted sword which I was quite proud of, most notably because the pointy bit was at the right end. From there we worked the alchemical magic to hone the gem into a powerful force and used the powers of prestidigitation to inset the gem into the sword. As Alley oversaw the project giving me precise directions and making sure I wasn’t on fire, it all began to take shape and form. The sword took on powerful combat properties and the hilt was imbued with attributes I couldn’t possibly comprehend. But as the magic swirled the sword came to life! Fire had been breathed into steel and as I pulled back this exquisite piece of craftsmanship, I set the railing and tapestries on fire.

I quickly realized that not only should I practice the art of swordplay out in the yard, but I have no handy buckets of water for unforeseen moments like these. Much to my dismay, Alley saved both our lives and my personal property by throwing unused pitchers full of ale onto the blaze and quenched it’s hungry desires. We were indeed alive and unscathed, but I now faced a personal tragedy, we had no ale. It was a strange case of give and take.

But back to the sword! It was a beauty! It was a wicked blend of earth, wind and fire and I couldn’t help but lash out at the trees, chairs, tables, benches and the misguided stag who stood befuddled and confused rather than running for his meager life.

As I stood over the ashes of my triumph, I realized this is a true warrior’s weapon! Foes will fall at my feet! Minions of darkness will cower in fear! Army’s of the undead will be crushed under it’s mighty power! And it also cooks a tasty steak sandwich.

It’s now time to talk to Halmar about this housing issue we keep having.

More brilliant musings about my adventures in New Britannia

3 Responses to Bring forth the flaming sword of smiting and devastation!

  • Blake Blackstone says:

    She drug me up to the tower too. A little high up there for my liking.

  • PeteWi the Disoriented says:

    She drugged you and took you to the top of the tower? That doesn’t sound like something Alley would do. You sure you weren’t under the influence of a little mandrake root and wandered out onto that ledge on your own? Seemed a bit spacey when I showed up on the scene. You should be careful with that sort of thing. There were some miscreant youths who wanted to use the Gust spell on you to see how close to the edge they could nudge you without causing a topple and plummet to the ground below. Alley and I had to shoo the vagabonds away. It’s getting to the point where you can’t balance on the edge of a tower without someone coming along trying to spoil the fun. This sort of thing would never happen if Halmar would come out of the pub and patrol the pathways of the Veiled Swamp. You don’t see this sort of juvenile behavior on the streets of Owl’s Head where what’s his name and the other guy keep an eye on things.

  • Alley says:

    yeah, other guy is really on top of things!

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