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This may look like a quiet, docile, unassuming home nestled away in a quaint little village, but I shall not be fooled.

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A fiery greeting to you all! I demand satisfaction!

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You don’t fool me! I know more of you scoundrels are hiding at the top of those stairs!

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Take that you smelly miscreants! You have insulted me for the last time! I don’t recall what that insult was or when it was leveled against me as I have too much blood in my ears to think straight. But I assure you it was completely unacceptable and shant be tolerated.

Windy, what do you mean we’re in the wrong house? I don’t believe for a moment these chaps were merely playing a casual game of dice when we smashed the door down and broke in.

More brilliant musings about my adventures in New Britannia

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